Christmastime

Christmas is an odd
time for me
I've never been
good with it,
or at least, I haven't
been good with it
for a very long time

my mother died just
before Christmas
in 1995,
but that's only a
small portion
of
my problem

I don't believe in
the idea of 'Jesus',
but I do believe in the
winter solstice,
a tangible something
I can actually see
and experience

I believe in
Christmas
trees even
though I don't
put one up
( I'm a little put off
by taking a living
thing and cutting it
down to somehow
concoct joy in my life )

I believe in
creating happiness
during this time of
year
I believe in
other people
to a degree
I believe in
random acts
of kindness

but I can't subscribe
to the notion
that it's all about
Jesus or no Jesus,
one way or the other
and I can't stand behind
the idea that taking
Christmas out of
Christmas is somehow
good for everyone

I believe in the look
on a child's face
when they open presents

I believe in
the idea that
celebration is
good for the
common good

I want to be
mesmerized by
flashing lights
and tensile
I want to be
taken aback
by reindeer and
fat jolly men
with white beards
I want the endless
spectacle of Christmas
shows turned over and over
again on television
I want people to have
a time of year where they
feel obligated to be good
to one another

I like to dream
and believe
that there is
something special
about people coming
together for the sole
purpose of joy
and happiness
even if it is only one
day out of the year

I like to believe that
there is something
magical about Christmastime
even if I don't believe
in Christ

and I like to believe that
maybe you believe
the same thing