drown the past

there are so many
of us that are damaged
from the past.
some hate men
and some hate women.
some despise
because of race,
or because of sexuality,
political leanings,
or simply because of
expression.

broken and bent,
we become trapped
by our experiences
rather than looking on
with curiosity
as to why we feel
the way we do.

so much harm is done
to us that we
have the tendency to
relate all harm
as being perpetrated
by those who have done
us harm in the past.
we use outward appearances
to dictate how we
respond in the future.
we see a certain race,
a certain sexuality,
a certain gender,
and assume that
since we were harmed
by that type of person,
all those types of people
are out to harm us.

we give light
to the probability
of future pains
from past sufferings.

we exclude entire
demographics
because of our
negative
experiences.

we use our past
to build walls
in the future
when we should be
trying to build
sepulchers
to the trials
we have endured.

with self

at times
life seems so futile.
no matter what you do, where
you go,
or how you do it,
it all ends in the same way-
a final breath,
an ending sigh
that breaks you through
to whatever it is that
resides
on the other side of reality.
and as hard as i have looked,
all i see is the need
to become a better person,
to experience life at its
finest,
to set goals and conquer
yourself.
the more you learn,
the more humble you become-
because to live
with the goal of
self realization
is to come to terms
with honesty.
it is an understanding
that puts you in your place.
as individual as we are,
we are not so much unalike
to be better than anyone else.
no matter how much debris
you collect
(fine cars, a beautiful home,
people who love you)
there is no other way out.
and in that we are as equal
as any other species.
we will feel pain, we will endure,
we will experience joy and suffering,
but at that final moment,
we are all the same;
joined with every other living thing.
so in time, we play games
with war, with finances, with the ever enduring
light that scrapes away at the surface
of our being.
we set traps to capture
ourselves in the slick
of life,
pretending to gain,
to lose,
to make amends.
as the light dims,
we wonder what we could have done
rather than the actions we have committed.
so i will play the game,
but always remain
with my head in the clouds,
wondering who i am
at the very heart of me.

a couple minutes of your time

instill happiness-
give it freely
without restriction.

be able to let go
when it is time.
understand
what it is to love
without condition.

let the flowers grow.

the seeds
have already been
planted. know
what it is
to provide nourishment.

evil is our
reaction to fear.
fear is our
reaction to ignorance.

success is a mind game;
always wanting for
something
that is at the tip of
your tongue
but cannot be spoken
for fear
of losing the word.

instill joy-
it's cheap
and brings smiles.

we all get
caught up
in the churning
waters,
afraid to be
swept away,
but we are all
capable of
throwing out
a life preserver.

lending
a helping hand
is the easiest thing
in the world.
it takes so little
time
to
drop a kind word,
to
invest interest
in another,
to
get past
the trappings of fear.

and if any
of this sounds
sappy
that's because it is.
i think
we need
a little more sappy
in the world
and a little less
self interest.

There's nothing wrong with being Social

       Give us
a Socialized world
       where people
take precedence
    over the whims
of the Charmed .

Give us a fair shake.

      Give us
the opportunity to advance
without
the opportunity
                   of destitution.

Allow us to educate ourselves
without the fear of unfair
            student loans
designed to keep the wealth
          with the wealthy.

Don't give us affordable Healthcare.
Give us
                        affordable Medicine.

Keep the financial Predators away
so we can get on with living.

Get us away from fossil fuels
so there's a little something left
for our children and grandchildren.

Take away Corporate Personhood
and only give that right to
individuals who are actually
                                       People.

Put a cap on Corporations
that fund Elections
so the voice of the
                                       People
can be heard.

Stop trying to divide us.

For We are the Citizens,
and You are working for Us.

throw it away

we are being sold
plastic products
with an expiration date

it is the pure
meaning of waste

after our phones
and televisions
and computers
and appliances
bite the dust,
they're stripped
and sent to the
landfill
where they
take a 450 year nap

as consumers,
we want more

more pointless products
to throw away
when they become outdated

more redundant devices
to disassemble
when the new redundant
device is available

and it has become
this way with all other
products;
our homes are stapled
together ...
our cars are little more
than computerized tinfoil ...
our streets
and bridges,
our very communities;
it's all meant to fall apart

we are looking for
the next big thing
to pack our
landfills

we're terribly wasteful

and a time will come
when there's simply
nothing left to waste

maybe then
we can go and dig up
all of the dumps to
scavenge through
the junk and reminisce
about how it all
fell apart

abuse

some people have been abused,
and I'm always amazed at those
who haven't when they say
              that we should stop living
in the past.
sometimes the past is all you have.
it has formed every fiber of your
being. when your childhood is
composed of getting punched
in the face, being screamed at
that you're a piece of shit,
and trained in the art of
self destruction,
it becomes almost
impossible to pull yourself up
by the bootstraps and get on
with the part of living
that reflects the best parts
of who you really are.
it's not about living in the past,
it's about the reoccurring
nightmare that was your childhood.
it's about dealing with trauma
and learning how best
not to lose your shit.
no matter how hard you pretend
to be over it, it never seems
to be far enough under you.
the memories rape your mind
and the fear comes ripping in
and your left as afraid as you were
all those years ago.
no matter how many bridges you
cross, or how many you burn to ashes,
you still remember the location
of every single one.
the best remedy seems to be
making every moment count, learning
how not to treat people the way
your were treated, and getting away
from those who did you harm.
but you always hope to one day
awaken without the nightmares
tainting the shadows
of your dreams.
you hope that someday
the memories will subside.
you hope to get to live the way
living
           was intended.

?

don't Worry ...
they're just as confused
as the rest of us.
even if they pretend
to know what's happening,
they're as much in the dark
as anyone else.
they invent the conspiracies
to try and make sense of
all the puzzle pieces.
and as much as the pieces seem
to fit together,
the images don't match.
there's always a gap,
some vacant space
that doesn't add up.
we're a rambling species
of mind and mass
searching for answers
to unspeakable questions.
your troubles are their troubles,
we're not all that different
even though we pretend to be.
we work, we suffer, we love,
and we toil away the hours
while looking for sparks of happiness
wherever we can.
the answers we find today
will be the questions of tomorrow.
the conspiracies never end.
all we can hope for is
pinpoints of light
where the cures,
the discoveries,
the triumphs
reside
to make way
for new
objectives
so we can
begin
asking
new
                   questions.

grow in greed

greed
is a lesion
on the face
for that which
humanity
has ever strove.

it is an infection
that has kept us back
for the entirety of
our existence.

it has allowed us
to kill,
to demean,
and to destroy
whatever hope there
ever was for an enlightened
view,
for the betterment of the species,
for but a chance to grow beyond
the confusion of our own skin.

girls like boys
with pretty toys,
flaunting what they have
to make pretty babies
who will grow up
to do much the same thing.

want more.
strive for more.
demand more
for giving less.
it is our special sickness
with humanity as it's only cure,
and in that we are destined for
infection.

a few friends

i've had a lot
of friends
in my life.

somehow,
the world
changes,
and you part
ways.

it's rarely
intentional.

you're together
one moment,
and moving
halfway
across the country
the next.

you say you'll
stay in touch,
but the distance
makes it too easy
to part.

i think about
those friends
from time to time
and wonder
what  life
has brought them,
where they found
their joy.
and i'm grateful
to have known them.
i keep every moment
stored away
to bring up
when i smell
something familiar,
or hear a certain song.
maybe the light
catches the window
in a particular way,
and that one time
we shared
comes flooding back.

but no matter what,
i remember you
fondly
for the good times
we shared,
for the laughs,
for the tears,
for the careless
moments we passed
together.

and i hope
it's the same
for you.

the trick

             is confusion.
the trick is upheaval.
the trick is misinformation
and division and propaganda
and a unified control
of wealth that allows
the very few to
fuck the very many.

there are no conspiracy theories.
there are only lies
fed to the public
to maintain the smallest
level of believability
to keep the machine
well greased
and in total control.

the trick is to
purchase the news outlets,
to only allow power to the
mainstream media if it is owned
by those who would profit
by the lies.

the trick is to make
America look like it is free
when it is simply a corporation
designed for profit.

the trick is treason.

the real trick is to be able
to read between the lies.

the lies are a puzzle box
glued together with
small truths.

small truths are
all that we have.

everything else
is an illusion
designed to make
us feel less like ants
with a magnifying glass
held above our heads
so when the time is right,
we won't realize
we're being burnt alive.

Taking out the Trash.

I'm a Disney fan.
As anti-establishment
as I can get, I still love
the illusion of Disney.
When I see the smiling faces,
the hordes of people,
the friendly dispositions,
it makes me feel as if
there is some hope left
for the the rest
of the world.
If we can leave our baggage
at the gates
and get caught up in the illusory
Magic
The Happiest Place on Earth
can provide,
then we are capable of
dropping our baggage
at any point
and looking at our
everyday issues
with the same exuberance.

My wife and I met
an older Gentleman that had been
working at the park
since old Walt was around.
As we were leaning up against a fence
enjoying some frozen lemonade,
he approached us, reached up,
and pulled down a branch
on an African Lily and picked
a flower.
He then explained the flower and
the various types around
the park before handing the flower
to my wife and saying,
"I thought you should have this."
Needless to say,
it made my wife's day,
and I was taken aback by
the man's manners and knowledge.

The older gentleman then proceed
to defuse an argument within
a group of park goers who were
arguing about whether they should wait in line
for a particular ride. After the man spoke his mind,
various heads in the group
began to nod in agreement,
and suddenly there were smiles
all around.
I couldn't help but smile too.
I winked at the man and he smiled knowingly
before going back to his work
of picking up litter with his little
dustpan and broom.

And I thought to myself,
there are just some people who are
better equipped at sorting the debris
and smiling when it is all cleaned up.

Wouldn't it be wonderful
if all of us could take
a few minutes out of our day
to pick through the litter
of life,
and lend a helping hand
to those who are trying
to take out the garbage?

what you've been led to believe

we work so hard
to keep the lights on,
to pay the bills,
to scrape up rent.
and it's all a trap.
one day, you're happy
without expectations,
without want,
and the next,
you're stuck
in a meaningless job,
wondering where your life went.
and you ask yourself,
is this it? am i really busting
my ass to stay
stagnant? 
and that's all there is.
you find out that all
the stuff
you have been told you should want
can fall away, or be taken away
in an instant. all the stuff is meaningless
and contributes nothing
to the face of reality.
in fact,
it makes you miserable.
-the house you will never pay off.
-the car that breaks down
-the clothes they tell you to wear
that were made in a sweatshop
                  it is all
             meaningless
when you look at the big picture.
so it comes down to what you really need.
-food
-a place to sleep
-happiness
so do what makes you happy.
failures are not failures,
they are steppingstones to success.
so keep at it until you're where you want to be.
this is no one's life but your own.
be your dreams.

protests turn violent

we get taken away
by the soundbites,
the misinformation,
the biased opinions.
and we do it because
we yearn for
an absolute truth.
we want the world to be
identifiable
in a way
that makes us feel
as if we fit in.
we want
black and white -
right or wrong -
truth or lie.
but the honesty of the matter
is that
nothing fits neatly
into a box
made of our base bias.
so when we see protests
we automatically jump
to conclusions
and form opinions
based on our own experiences.
and that's how we're wrong.
we lack empathy,
and cannot understand
how someone else
may have a different experience
than our own.
we see gun violence
and believe that all guns
have the potential for killing
without realizing
that there are guns
that will never kill
another living being.
we see black men engaged
in violent acts
and assume
that all black men are potentially
violent. when, in fact, there are
the majority of black men
who will never commit a crime.
we see white men on the media
that are professionals and believe
that all white men are potentially
professional. but that is not the case.
there are plenty of white men
who fail, who fall below social expectations.
most of what we encounter
and base our theories on
are media driven
to secure ratings,
commercials,
and potential profits.
the media will do
whatever it can
to make sure
you tune in every evening,
even if they have to resort to lies,
and bending the truth to fit
into the most shocking story possible.
it takes a lot of work
to see
between the lies, the truths,
the bending lines
that we are force fed
every time
we interact with information.
but it is our responsibility
to be objective,
and to find the least
absolute answers
to the questions
that confront us.
it is our duty
to refrain
from ignorance.