i left myself once
and another time after that
and it will happen again, i'm sure.
out there with the trees
creating a canopy above me,
tiny threads of light
poking through.
a small white dot rested
on my leg.
it move in tiny increments
i could not measure.
such subtle movements
as if time was gathering
to see if
i was paying attention.
and i was.
but as i looked,
i realized i
was looking down
from a higher position than
i should be.
i was higher than i should have been.
i was in the trees looking down
at that small beam of light,
resting on my leg,
so far below.
i was empty, a feeling of numb
when there's no such thing as numbness.
i was outside of myself, too afraid to look up.
i thought about staying that way,
never coming down again.
i wouldn't be missed
all that much.
everyone would eventually grow tired of remembering.
they would learn to forget.
and i wondered where i would be.
what would become of my container,
resting against the tree?
what would i become?
it was sudden when i returned
to my place of resting.
i could feel the bark against my back.
an ant crawled along the grooves
of my hand.
i could smell the scent of pine
gathering around me.
it was a moment of shock
as i caught my breath
and found that the tiny dot of light
had moved
several feet away.
and all i could
think about
was breathing.
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