every time: it's not even real

   i went through
a period
          of panic
where i thought
       that it
             was too late
and nearly done.

sometimes i don't see
                the moon
     for months on end
     and then i look up
     and it's suddenly there:
              a giant blinking
     ball of light, and i'm
     somewhat relieved,
     but i can't blame it
          for hiding.
                        we all need
                 to go away for
             a while,
                   even if it is
             only a perception.

i still believe it is nearly done,
i'm just not
      as inclined as i
                used to be
      to whether it means
               anything or
                    not.

sometimes i stare
              into the mirror
    and my reflection
                acts
      as if i'm not
             even
                    there.
 
   and i can't argue.